Your "WHY I AM DOING THIS" is that you experienced what a doula could do at your birth or at a friend's birth, have fallen in love with the idea of birth
​ and want to help others recreate that feeling.

When you lose sight of your why, you can forget what this career is about for you (and your clients) and it can lead to burn-out, overwhelm, and feelings of being taken advantage of when you aren't working from that passion point anymore.

 Without your WHY to help build a framework for your goals in an authentic and heartfelt way, you don't know where to focus or what to do next with your doula work. You aren't sure if you should pivot your business or learn a new skill.

1) Take a look at what some of your most memorable moments as a doula have been for you. If you haven't been in business long, look back at moments that lead up to you taking a training and moments at your training. Make a list of 5-10 moments that stand out the most. Do not edit your list as you are making it. If something comes to mind write it down. You'll have time to reflect later.

They don't just have to be client-centered, but could be connection or family-centered as well.

 Really spend some time on this. What were some of the small details of this memorable moment? What spoke to you most at that moment? Why did it make the list? What were the emotions you felt? 

Here's a list prompts to get you started if you are struggling:

• Client stories and testimonials
• A client you had a special connection with
• An event you attended or hosted that affected you in a memorable way
• A comment from family, friends, your children about your work that touched you
• Something valuable you learned from a training you took
• A new perspective you gained
• A positive impact your work made on your family or yourself
• Something FUN that happened because of your work
• What your income did for your family
• What your work did for you it could be added self-confidence, the ability to provide support to others, how the income made a difference in your life, etc

A word about negativity here: Be very careful with listing negative moments. While negative events are memorable, unless there is a postive change that came out of the negative event, please leave it off your list. When your list contains negative moments, your mind struggles with the emotions attached and it becomes a challenge to use the exersize to move you forward. 


2) Do NOT judge your list! Your list will be completely different from someone else's list and that's wonderful. There are no wrong answers here. No one else can define your memorable moments. Your list isn't required to be only altruistic in nature. If it was, go back to the prompts and add a few other memorable moments.

3) Now that you have your list of memorable moments and details about each moment, look at each moment and look for overarching themes. Where your memorable moments connection (family, client, making friends)? Where they about service (giving back, paying your knowledge forward)? 

​Other potential overarching themes could be:

• Teaching
• Learning
• Self improvement
• Meeting your goals
• Providing for yourself/your family

4) Now take those themes and write about what you love about each one. WHY the theme is important to you.  Again, take your time here.

5) Now you have your current WHY. Keep it in a place that you can see it. Use it for helping you get over hurdles in your business. Let it motivate you or keep you moving when you wonder if doula business is really for you, or doing the tasks that aren't your favorite.

BONUS TIP TO EXPAND UPON
6) Use your WHY stories and themes for guiding you when making decisions in your business.

Example: If one of your overarching themes is connection, use that to move forward and make decisions in your business. Maybe you can host a pregnancy or parenting group, hold doula gatherings to meet others in your area, reach out to other businesses that have similar clients and philosophies to create collaborations, host a pregnancy fair or baby fair.

6) Tell me your WHY! Pop over to my Facebook page  or email me at [email protected] and let me know!

We hear a lot of talk about "fake it 'till you make it" and while that can and does resonate with some people, it's not what I'm talking about here.  I'm also not saying you should vomit birth all over everyone at a networking event. Save that for doula gatherings.

You do not need a completely different persona when you network your doula business. Be your best true authentic self at events. Great networking events are more about 

As an introvert, you know you need time to yourself to recharge. Make it a priority to schedule that time into your calendar. Pushing yourself and constant hustle until you crash, won't get you anywhere faster. Recovery from a crash usually takes longer than the slow and steady approach to business building.

Social media can be a life saver for introvert business owners! Your social media accounts can showcase your amazing business, without you being in the spotlight. Stay at home in your jammies and post away. Most social media platforms also have a scheduling option. Use this handy feature when you plan your downtime.

OK, so you are actually going out to meet with PEOPLE! Prepare yourself for this. Have some conversation starters already planned out. Check out the event venue online, so you know all the details ahead of time....where to park, what door to enter, etc. Arrive early, so that the room slowly fills around you, rather than walking into an already filled room. Have an exit plan in place to use if you get too overwhelmed. Then, plan for downtime afterwards!

Everyone has unique gifts including introverts! Spend some time figuring out exactly what they might be for you. Maybe you are an amazing listener. That's an amazing skill for networking. Many times people think networking is all about getting YOUR INFORMATION to as many people as possible, when really, you want to listen to others and learn about them and help them with a problem. Maybe you are great at reading a room. This is a huge skill to use at networking events. Scan the room and look for friendly people to talk to. You'll be the first to know when someone really isn't interested in chatting and you can move along to a more friendly face.

Introverts can also be people pleasers who take on too much to make other's happy.  Guard you're yeses. If you are fully committed to the favor that someone is asking, let them know you'll have to check your calendar and get back with them. Never say YES on the spot. Take some time and think over the ask to determine if it's a good fit for you, whether you really have the time to complete the ask, and if it's something you will value doing.

And a bonus tip. Even if you agree to anything from a networking lunch to a committee position, you can change your mind. It's best to change your mind on big commitments early on because people are counting on you, but a simple event or lunch can be canceled the day of the event. A simple text or message saying that something has come up and you aren't able to make it, is enough. There's no need for a long story.

Good luck! You CAN do networking events as long as you are prepared!

Love, 
​Deb