overcoming your money mindset blocks

When I first became a doula, I carried a lot of money baggage with me. I had deeply ingrained beliefs that made it almost impossible to charge what I was worth. I believed that money itself was bad, that living in poverty was somehow morally superior (what I now call "poverty elitism"), and that charging little or nothing for my services was the right thing to do. After all, I was helping families and doing heart-centered work—shouldn’t that be enough?
Like many small business owners, I struggled with the messaging I had absorbed as a child. My parents didn’t provide a healthy model for financial success. Instead of wealth-building strategies, I learned, “Don’t make more, just spend less,” and “Extras are wasteful.” Money was to be feared, not embraced. I also carried the notion that wealthy people were greedy and unkind, and I unconsciously resisted becoming one of “them.”

The Real Cost of Money Blocks

These beliefs didn’t just make me feel righteous; they led me straight into burnout. I was constantly overextending myself, offering discounted or free services, and saying yes to clients who weren’t a good fit simply because I felt guilty about charging what I needed to earn a sustainable income. I exhausted myself in the name of service and still felt financially unstable.
I remember very specifically at one point preparing lunch for my children. We had ramen noodles when the client that I was working with for very little money, had a new car, a huge beautiful house with lots of healthy, better food than my ramen.
I came to a hard realization: I couldn’t pour from an empty cup. If I wanted to continue supporting families, I had to change my mindset about money. I had to shift from a scarcity mindset to an abundance mindset.

Reframing Money as a Doula

The first step was challenging the negative money narratives I had carried for years. I started asking myself new questions:

• Is money really bad, or is it just a tool?
• If I had more money, wouldn’t I be able to help more people?
• Why do I think being poor is more socially responsible than being financially stable?
• If I charge my worth, won’t I be able to serve families better without being drained?

I also started paying attention to successful doulas who were making a great living without guilt. They weren’t greedy or cruel. They were thriving and able to donate their time and resources in ways I had never considered because I was stuck in survival mode.

Steps to Overcoming Money Blocks

1. Acknowledge Your Money Beliefs   Write down the messages you learned about money growing up. Ask yourself if they are really true or just conditioned beliefs.
2. Reframe Your Perspective   View money as a resource that allows you to serve your clients better. A well-supported doula can be a better advocate, a better educator, and a more present birth worker.
3. Set Boundaries and Pricing with Confidence   Charging a sustainable rate isn’t just for you—it ensures that your clients receive the best version of you.
4. Surround Yourself with Financially Empowered Business Owners   Learn from doulas and entrepreneurs who have overcome these struggles and are thriving.
5. Practice Receiving   Whether it’s accepting payment without apologizing or allowing yourself to invest in business tools, practice receiving money with gratitude instead of guilt.

Your Worth Isn’t Tied to Struggle

Shifting my money mindset changed everything. I now see financial stability as a gift that allows me to be a better doula, mentor, and advocate. The truth is, the more financially empowered you are, the greater impact you can make. When doulas charge fairly, we set a standard that values our work and encourages others to do the same.
If you’re struggling with money blocks, know that you’re not alone. The good news is that you can change your mindset, break the cycle, and build a sustainable business that honors both your heart and your bank account. You deserve to thrive!